The Pain.

Assalamu'alaikum.

So, yeah. These days, I keep on experiencing emotional breakdown. And my tears easily come out. I'm so dumb. So weak. All this time I always try to not let my tears come out but..... There. Tears. Again. Such a weakling boohoo am I? Oh maybe.

Three things that every time I think about it, I'll cry;
a) When see people have strong bond with family,
b) When see people with their true friends,
c) When see cute couple.

Conclusion: Najla is forever alone.

I know. Stupid reasons. But I can't help it. I'm not close with my family. Maybe because of the gap. Maybe because of my rebellion. And I'm just a loner at home. Trapped in bedroom, writing, drawing, reading, singing. Just do what I want in my beloved bedroom.

True friends? I don't know. I don't really... have... true friends... Best friends? Yeah, kinda. But true friends? I don't... really... think... so. I mean, yeah, I have so many secrets and I never tell them. Because I feel like, they never understands. And every time wants to talk them, sometimes it's awkward. And, we're not really fun. No fun. Boring conversation. And my best friends has their best friend and me? Ha. I'm not good at making new friends. ESPECIALLY making best friend.

Oh. Relationship. Cute couple. Ha ha ha so impossible. Yeah, I'm too young. But what makes me cry is when think about him. It sucks to have crush on someone who's taken. It sucks to still have feelings towards a guy who dumped me, who's a jerk, who maybe already hates me, who doesn't want anything to do with me, who is happy with his girlfriend. And I always watch their happiness together. While me, just, okay.


So yeah whatever. I grow mature. Ha ha ha mature? Speak about mature, most people never believe I'm 14. Why? So old ah? Haiya. Some says I look 16, some even says I look like university student?! And some say I don't look old, just MATURE. Mature based on my face and how I talk. I mean, my opinion, my tweets? My thinking? Yes. And my mum said it's because I watch and read adult things a lot. Okay mum okay =='

So yeah, gonna stop by now. Good bye!